In Defence of fuckin' Cursing

The woman who's sitting close by while I'm editing this post is fuckin' bothering me. She keeps on talking and talking about her husband's shitty job at an accounting firm and the bullshit she's doing at the divinity school. Yark. And that jerk who's sitting with her listens quietly while I pull the trigger in my mind and shoot her a goddamn bullet in the head.
But let's not waste our precious time on that gal's trivialities. She's fat and ugly. And she looks like a goddamn horse. The introduction to this post is merely an illustration of the appropriate use of cuss words. I was indeed very touched (to say the least) by a recent article written in defense of cursing.
The troubling thing, according to the author, is that even the hardest hitting magazines draw back to censorship to get rid of such basic words as "fuck" and "shit". Even though they are commonly accepted and understood adjectives of the English language, an increasing number of media stay clear of their use. Talking about Darfur or Tibet, the use of the ford "fuckin'" to underlie the extent of the mess would not be usurpating the language. Nor would a "mothafucker" be inappropriate when one comes to describe Mugabe. Right? So why shall we, for God's fuckin' sake, work around those words when their use is so clearly fuckin' appropriate?
I have another exemple of a current life situation where a nicely placed curse might have releaved much of the tension. Things went a lil' bit sour with my girl yesterday. There, a "fuck, fuck, fuck" would have done a pretty awesome fuckin' job.
The author's "favorite example of prudery has to be when Men's Health — a magazine read entirely by people with penises — quoted Robin Williams explaining how to save a stand-up routine. If all else fails, he said, "go for the d—- joke." Can you believe that? A men's magazine afraid of the word dick." I cannot agree more with that statement. Goddamn it, we are dicks and jerks, so let's be candid about it, for once. I don't want to read an article about my fuckin' dick without the words "fuckin' awesome" used together.
So the author has elaborated a set of rules for the appropriate use of our language's most basic adjectives: "For instance, shit is an all-purpose word [you] should use [...] when failing an exam or watching a favorite team cost you $20 by blowing a huge lead. However, if you use lose more than $20, that's a fuck. If you're dealing with the IRS, that might be a shit or a fuck, depending on who did your taxes; if you're dealing with the FBI or ATF, that's always a fuck. Among other cuss words, asshole is good for the boss or moron coworkers or in-laws, but motherfucker should be reserved for more weighty situations, such as when a mugger shoots you even after you give him your wallet, or you realize you're slipping off the edge of the Grand Canyon as you back up for a family photo. I hear motherfucker invoked for the simplest of transgressions, such as a foul during a basketball game. No, no, no! "Fuck you" will suffice, or maybe "What the hell?" Motherfucker is a fairly serious accusation."


To read the article on Chiprowe: http://www.chiprowe.com/articles/swear.html